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Reading Wine Residue | Homo sarcasmus - the official blog of Heath L. Buckmaster

In today’s society of sophistication and refinement, reading tea leaves is so old testament.

Today, we read wine residue.

Wine residue is created when you allow the last drop of red wine to settle and dry up in the bottom of a wine glass. I know there will be some of you who are in shock that a drop of precious wine would go unconsumed, but if you want to foretell the future, you have to make sacrifices.

Wine ResidueToday’s reading comes from a lovely Cotes du Rhone red table wine.

The first thing you might notice is how much this looks like a bloodshot eye.

Depending upon how much wine you’ve had, this could indicate a reflection of your current intoxication status, but try not to get distracted when reading the residue.

Clear your mind of all extraneous thoughts. The first thing you will probably notice is the Grim. It’s really not unusual for the Grim to appear in the reading, since everyone dies, and it’s a death omen. It’s nothing to be concerned about unless of course you are an immortal. If that’s the case, stay away from large swords.

Solarized view of the residueNext you will probably notice that the image tends to point to the upper right, or North East.

Obviously, this is because of how you might have turned the glass when picking it up, therefore, ignore this.

The important item to note is that the residue is thicker on one side than another. This indicates something from your past, namely that you set the glass down on an uneven surface and it was tilted as it dried.

Now that we’ve had a reading of the past, let’s move on to the present. What you should notice is that the glass is presently empty and you need more wine. This is a very powerful message, and should not be ignored. The present is more important than the past. Learn from it and act upon it.

Finally, we look to the future. For this we look at the entire residue stain. It needs to be washed before putting more wine into the glass. Your future holds a trip to the kitchen to clean the stain. This is a good omen, and tells you that there is more wine in your future. What more could we hope for from the future?

And thus we have the three phases of wine residue reading. I encourage each of you to read your own wine residue to see what you discover. It is an enlightening and spiritually moving experience.

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