In case you were wondering, this is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help me…um…uh…whatever.

Would you travel?

Would you immediately start looking for a new job?

Would you sell-off possessions?

Would you be happy?

First, let’s make some wild and crazy assumptions for the purpose of this post:

1. Everyone has something called a “soul”

2. It’s a tangible thing that can be prayed for, stolen, and sold.

3. There is no such thing as separation of Church and State in America (you don’t really have to assume this, it’s nearly fact).

Second, let’s have a definition. What does The Book have to say about a soul:

Pronunciation: ’sOl
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English soule, from Old English sAwol;
1 : the immaterial essence, animating principle, or actuating cause of an individual life
2 : the spiritual principle embodied in human beings, all rational and spiritual beings, or the universe

So now to the root of my concern. Could you sue someone who prays for your soul without your permission? Why am I asking this question? Because several years ago I was the recipient of religious based harassment at work, and the offending party and their spouse took it upon themselves to “engage” the holy spirit on my behalf. Specifically they said:

“Holy Spirit we pray for God to transform this lost soul”

Capitalization is their’s, not mine. After they called upon this alleged holy spirit, they consulted their own book to find interesting quotes to help me out. Here are some that they came up with.

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom - Proverbs 11:1-3

The fear of the LORD teaches a man wisdom, and humility comes before honor - Proverbs 15:32-34

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves - Philippians 2:2-4

To slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to show true humility toward all men - Titus 3:1-3

Young men, in the same way be submissive to those who are older. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” - 1 Peter 5:4-6

Interesting words indeed (and is it just me or isn’t that just SO old testament (except for one)), and I’m sure they live their lives in full deference to what their god wants and expects them to do. But back to my question.

So they have taken it upon themselves (with a little help from above) to pray for my “lost soul”, and even further, to ask their god to actually “transform” my soul. I’m sorry, but I think that’s crossing the line. It’s one insulting thing to pray for a soul that isn’t your own, but to try to transform it is bordering on assault. Keep your hands off my soul, I say. How would you like me to come into your body and change some things around?

What’s that, a spleen? I don’t think you need that any more, let’s transform that into a bird bath. Is that a heart? Oh please, it would look so much better transformed into a box of Altoids. Who wouldn’t want to be curiously minty on the inside?

But can I sue?

Can I take them to court and charge them with assault on my soul? Our Christian country would never argue that there’s no such thing as a soul, which means that if it’s my property, something that is unique to me, then if they try to manhandle it then I have a right to protect it. Obviously, I don’t want to assault them in return (but could I claim self-defense?), so what choice do I have but to join our litigious based society and sue them, and the holy spirit, and god?

If I lived in Romania, for example, I couldn’t because according to the court - “…the defendant is neither an individual nor a company, and is not subject to a civil court of law’s jurisdiction“. There was also another minor problem because - “God doesn’t have a residence where the Prosecutor’s Office can send a subpoena“.

This presents a few issues - with that whole trinity thing I’d have to name all three components in my lawsuit, and nowhere in their prayers did they mention that Jesus was helping out (although I might be able to take the corporate path since apparently, he’s incorporated now). And if the prosecutor can’t find a P.O.Box for LOG, then would I have to try him in absentia?

I did find an interesting comment to a post about the Romanian case: “Imagine how many people would start believing in God if you were able to sue him.” I’d take that a step farther to say, imagine how many people would join the class-action lawsuit against god for all their woes?

As I can find no legal basis (or restriction for that matter) for a lawsuit and assault charge against someone who prays for the transformation of my soul, I put it to you, the blog reading public…what do you think?

(and I’m secretly hoping that pharyngula will weigh in here)

As I start to look at re-branding this blog, I wanted to take a moment to call your attention to what I feel are 16 of the most interesting posts that have flowed from my brain in the last couple of years. You may not find all of them hilarious or funny, as many of my posts tend to be, but you might find them interesting.

Insightful, inspiring, informative. The 3 I’s of blogging. Well, interesting as well, so really the 4 I’s of blogging. My four eyes. You get the point.

So without further or farther adieu or adoo, here I present them for your review:

1. Back before my wordpress migration, I did a 5 post series on the 2006 Out and Equal Workplace Equality Conference. You can start at the beginning when Rachelle and I arrived in Chicago, enjoy our adventures at a disgusting restaurant called Stetson’s, and revel in the magnificence of us meeting Mr. Sulu of the Enterprise.
2. Continuing on the multi-post theme, who could forget the 5 days of Victoria, BC. Not only did I finally get to meet Bobby Apperson, but we once again experience the awe inspiring Butchart Gardens.
3. Next on the list is an informational page about the Randompedia, the Random Encyclopedia. Are you looking for things you’d never find in wikipedia? Look no further/farther.
4. A pivotal point in my life centered around an event in November 2006. NaNoWriMo, the writing competition to complete a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. Well let me tell ya, I didn’t just complete it, I blew it out of the water in 12 days then started on the next one! Here’s the post that started it all. (And the post about my first book published on amazon.com)
5. Ready for something spooky and scary? How about the story behind one of my favourite holidays? Hellaween! (I also shared the true history of Valentine’s Day too, but it’s not one of my favourite holidays because it’s not really a holiday. However, Easter is.)
6. The list wouldn’t be complete without at least one GLBT informational component, and what better than a warning that you should not do business with the gays. Ok, maybe two components - especially a warning about hate crimes.
7. The Hellaween season continued with a quick movie review. Some of you might recall the 8 Films to Die For series, and specifically, the movie Unrest. Yeah - I tried to forget it too. Here’s the review.
8. One of the longest series posts that I’ve done here is the Childhood Journal. After receiving a stack of old notebooks from my parents, I realized there was a goldmine of interesting writings from yours truly back when I was a wee little boy. Here’s the one that kicked it off, which includes a link to the entire series.
9. Ok, so GLBT is a common theme here, and so I should probably fill you all in on what it means to be a Friend of Dorothy.
10. Want to know how to make the world a better place? Try Star Trek.
11. I don’t just care about making the world a better place, I also want to make your lives and relationships better. Who knew that you could learn so much about a relationship from your toothbrush?
12. One of the most popular posts I’ve ever done was about throwing a wine party. It’s really quite easy, and I’ve provided simple instructions on making it a memorable event.
13. Some of you were probably wondering when I’d get to this one, and number 13 is probably appropriate for it. That’s right, it’s my American Idol series.
14. Time for a meme. I’ve done quite a few of these, so I’ll lump some together into #14. What’s on your iPod, iTunes Meme, and What’s On Your Desk.
15. Sometimes it’s important to share your dreams. For some reason I felt compelled to share one of my most bizarre ones with you.
16. Finally, I provided more education, in a post on 8 Quick Tips for Aspiring Amateur Photographers. We don’t just provide entertainment here, we also educate.

So there you have it. 16 posts (actually 22 but in a list of 16) that resonated with me and with my readers (based on a very scientific process that I developed just for this post). Have a great time browsing around, and remember that these are just a sample of what we have to offer here at Digital Heath.

Also remember - safety first!

This just warms my heart on so many levels.

Among the dozens of wrenching accounts to come out of the collapse of the Interstate 35W bridge in Minneapolis, the actions of 20-year-old Jeremy Hernandez were a bright spot: Trapped in a tipping school bus with 50 children, he kicked open the back door and began helping them one by one to safety.

…

Mr. Hernandez was not available to comment on the offer; Ms. Schwartz said he left town for northern Minnesota late on Friday, overwhelmed by the attention and concerned that his co-workers were being overlooked. He spent the weekend fishing. When President Bush’s staff contacted him to request a photo opportunity, “He was just, like, ‘Nope,’ ” she said.

[Link to full article]

And it seems the behaviour is catching on around the world…I just love the French.

WOLFEBORO, United States (AFP) - Cecilia Sarkozy was seen Sunday taking a stroll in the northeastern US town where she and the French president are vacationing a day after she declined lunch with the US president. [Link]

I was in Guerneville, CA earlier this week, camping.

As I walked across a bridge from the town to the campground, a girl sitting on the walkway with random guy said the following as I walked past her:

There are two people I hate more than anything in this town…Brittany and Tiffany.  

I don’t know who these people are, but I’m thinking that if they live in Guerneville (which is a very nice town by the way), their names are not spelled as simply as Brittany and Tiffany.

I’m thinking it’s more like Brittani with little hearts over the i’s. Or Typhanie with a ph instead of an f. Or some combination of y’s and ie’s like Bryttanie and Tyffynie, or heck, even Tyffyny and Bryttyny.

You could go nuts with it. 

This past weekend, David and I went on a photography trip to Land Park and the Sacramento Zoo. We hadn’t actually planned on going to the zoo, but it was there, so we went.

Since I always have completely opposite opinions on everything, I both love and hate zoos. My love for the zoo comes from seeing animals that I would otherwise probably never see in my lifetime. Actually feeling the presence of a snow leopard is so different than reading about them on wikipedia. Seeing the gazing eyes of a Siberian tiger, the thoughtful face of an orangutan, or the munching crunchings of a giraffe who is eagerly devouring a carrot, is what it’s all about.

The part that I hate is that in many zoos, there is simply no space for the animals to live. How can a zebra exercise when their habitat is only 50 feet? They need to run across the plains! How can a burrowing owl (pdf) soar above the skies when they are in a cage the size of my bathroom? They can’t, and that hurts me to see. Animals need space to be themselves, just like we do as humans.

Anyway, here are some of the beautiful creatures at our zoo. You can select them and they will open into full size.

And if you’re interested in seeing what the flamingo’s did as soon as we walked up….view this video: